Rarely does a dish serve as such a central metaphor for a film's primary conflict: in Parasite, boujee beef sits oppressively atop bargain noodles in the Park family's version of Ram-Don, the way they sit so literally atop others. It was tricky doing this one without spoilers, but I think I managed!

Quick Instant Pack Method:

1 packet of Neoguri (store bought)
1 packet of Chapagetti (store bought)
1 piece of Korean Hunu Sirloin (Japanese Kobe is a good substitute, or any fancy steak you’re feeling)

Ramen Noodles:

Udon Noodles:

Korean Dashi:

Jajangmyeon:

Jjamppong:

Method

Quick Instant Pack Method

Trim off some of the excess fat from the steak of your choice and cube it into bite-sized pieces. Sear the cubes in a saucepan with hot oil.
In some shallow boiling water, place both sets of packaged noodles along with the spicy broth packets and frozen vegetable packets.
After about 4 minutes, both the noodles and beef should be finished cooking. Drain all but ⅓ cup of the cooking broth and add the chapagetti’s packet of vegetable oil and bean sauce. Mix to combine, it will turn a muddy brown color.
Add the beef to the noodles and stir. Serve and enjoy!

Ramen Noodles

Start by baking baking soda in a 250℉ oven for 1 hour. Combine 2 tsp of the baked baking soda with 4 ounces plus 1 Tbsp of water. Stir to dissolve completely.
In a mixing bowl, add 240g all-purpose flour along with the alkaline water mixture you just created. Stir to combine with a large wooden spoon. You want to make a shaggy but cohesive ball of dough. If needed, add a little extra water.
Once it’s combined, pat it into a disc, dust it with bread flour, put into a bowl and cover. Let it rest for 30 minutes.
Once it has rested for 30 minutes, remove from bowl and lightly dust it with flour. Roll the dough out and then fold into thirds, and then into thirds again. Roll out just a little bit and then wrap in plastic wrap and let rest for another 30 minutes.
Attach your pasta attachment to your stand mixer. Remove dough from plastic wrap and dust with bread flour. Give it one pass through on your pasta roller’s widest setting. Fold into thirds, rotate 90° and pass it through again on your pasta press at about 2 or 3. If it seems too long, give it a chop in half.
Dust with bread flour again, before passing through your noodle cutter attachment. Add some more bread flour and twist into little nests on a rimmed baking sheet that’s also been dusted with bread flour.

Udon Noodles

Start by weighing out 250 grams each of all-purpose flour and bread flour. Add 1 ½ tsp kosher salt to 250 milligrams water. Stir and add to the flour. This gives the dough a hydration of 50%.
Mix that around with your fingers until a shaggy ball of dough forms. Turn it out on an unfloured countertop and knead it until semi-smooth but a little lumpy.
Place into a heavy duty ziploc bag and squeeze out all of the air before sealing shut. Optionally, you can knead the dough on top of a table with your feet. You can also simply knead with your hands until the dough is flattened into a large disc. Fold into fours, place back into the bag and flatten again. Repeat this 5x. Let rest at room temperature for 1-3 hours.
Generously flour the dough and countertop and roll it out using a rolling pin until the dough has reached a thickness of about 3mm.
For slicing, place the dough on top of itself like an accordion. Make sure not to press down on the folds and that the folds don’t overlap. With a very sharp knife, cut into thin udon noodle sizes.
Once cut, unfurl the noodles and dust them with a generous amount of flour (cornstarch or potato starch) and twist them into nests.

Korean Dashi

In a large pot, pour in 8 cups of water. Add 6 medium pieces of dried kelp and let them soak for 1 hour. Afterwards, add a handful of dried anchovies.
Bring to a roaring simmer and hold it there for about 10 minutes before draining and setting aside.

Jjangmyeon

In a small saute pan, add 2 Tbsp olive oil, ⅓ cup sweet black bean paste, and 1 Tbsp oyster sauce. Fry together for about 2 minutes and set aside.
In a large, high-walled saute pan, heat 2 Tbsp of vegetable oil over medium-high heat until almost smoking. Add 6 ounces of diced pork loin and saute for 2-3 minutes. Add chopped zucchini, chopped yellow onion, and shredded cabbage.
Saute together for 2-3 minutes, or until the cabbage is just starting to wilt. Grate in about an inch’s worth of fresh ginger. Add 1 Tbsp mirin and saute for 30 seconds. Add the black bean mixture that you fried earlier. Mix that in until everything is evenly coated, then add in 1 cup of Dashi broth (chicken broth or water work too).
Let that mixture gently simmer for 2-3 minutes then thicken everything by adding ¼ cup of water and 1 Tbsp of cornstarch. Mix together, give it a taste, and season to your taste preference with kosher salt. Cover to keep warm.
Boil ramen noodles for no more than 3 minutes, checking for doneness after 90 seconds. Put noodles into a bowl and top with jajangmyeon.

Jjamppong

Heat 2 Tbsp vegetable oil in a large pot over medium heat. Add 3 Tbsp Korean chili flakes, thinly sliced white bottoms of 4 scallions, an inch of grated ginger, and 2 cloves of grated garlic.
Saute this together for 2-3 minutes and then add chopped yellow onion, sliced zucchini, 4 ounces of shredded cabbage, and 4 thinly sliced shiitake mushrooms. At this time, add the Udon noodles to boiling water since they take 12 minutes to cook.
Saute for 2-3 more minutes until everything begins to turn soft. Add 4 cups of dashi broth. Cover and bring to a simmer before adding your seafood of choice. Cover and let simmer. Season with salt and pepper to taste.
Take udon noodles out of boiling water when they’re finished and rinse under cold water. Place noodles in a bowl and top with jjamppong.